Tuesday, January 5, 2010

A Little Update

Thank you for your condolences about my grandma. I have many good memories of her. The last couple of years she had been in a private assisted living home for Alzheimer patients. It was a lovely, lovely home and she was lovingly cared for. I hadn't seen her since last January or February. She had gotten to the point where she really didn't remember anyone other than my dad and my uncle very well. The last time I saw her she was confused and distressed. I prefer to remember her great storytelling skills (she had a lifetime of stories she loved to tell), and her love for the Lord. She had endured many trials in her life, and she wasn't perfect by any means, but she had a rock solid faith, an incredible work ethic, and she loved her children and grandchildren to bits. Grandma Bunny and Tata had a nice friendship, and I'm sure they've reconnected in the presence of the Lord.

For Michael this week has been slightly better than last. He's been on the Afinitor since Friday, and I think we've noticed a small improvement in his overall sense of well being, but it's hard to tell. He's still having difficulty sleeping and eating, but he's got a good attitude. It's so hard to see him wasting away, and so I ply him with food every chance I get. He's been having more issues with acid reflux, and consequently it can be hard for him to keep food down. It's rough, I tell you.

Several friends have stopped by to visit this week already. I know Michael enjoys the company, but it tires him out and distracts him from eating. We're going to have to limit any visits in the near future to thirty minutes. That's hard to ask when some people have traveled an hour or more to see him, but it's what he needs right now. Last week we had a good visit from a pastor at my church, and I think that got Michael thinking about some spiritual matters. I've been praying with him before I leave for work in the morning - praying for physical healing and spiritual awakening.

Shortly after I leave for work, my mom arrives and cares for Michael until his mom gets here around noon. It's still hard to leave him, but at least I know he's in good hands.

Tomorrow Michael returns to UCLA for the CT scan of his scalp. That will determine the dimensions of the scalp lesions for his upcoming radiation therapy. While he's up there, he also going to have a blood test to determine the oxygen level in his blood. If it's below normal, then he will be able to start oxygen here at home.

I'm hanging in there. I don't like going to bed alone each night even though I sleep much better. I've shed more tears than I wanted to over that, but it's a hard thing to accept. I miss Michael's companionship before bedtime, too. He's just been so tired that by the time I get home he's dozing off and on. I miss him. However, I try to be as accepting of what's happening in our lives as possible. I just get up and do my best every day, and I pray that God will do what I cannot do.


Joanna A. said...

Your blog caught my attention in my Google search for "All Things New". My name is Joanna and I am married to a Michael too. I am a believer in Jesus Christ and I just want you to know that I will be praying for you and your husband. I pray along with you for physical healing and spiritual awakening for your Michael. I pray for continued strength, hope and peace for you. May you continue to be comforted by the Holy Spirit as Our Father holds you close. May 2010 bring you and Michael healing, renewal and restoration in every area of your lives.

Nonnie said...

I'm so sorry about all of it. You are a strong lady...I hope all gets progressively better!

Anonymous said...

Ted really wanted to stop by and visit Michael on this little business trip, but he ended up carpooling with a guy in TO. Is Michael up to a phone conversation sometime soon, or is that difficult for him with the coughing?
Hang in there, Joannah. God is holding you; I pray that you will find comfort in that.

AprilMay said...

Doing your best every day is all God expects of you! Your best is amazing and heads and tails above what mine would be. As for sleeping... is there a way to put two beds in one room? Perhaps you could compromise?

AprilMay said...

Oh, and beautiful prayer from Joanna A! :)

Joannah said...

Joanna A., thank you for praying for us. What a sweet coincidence that we share the same name, as do our husbands.


Isabella's Mommy and Daddy said...

You are doing an amazing job .. I am sure it is hard.. glad Michael is feeling a little better..
YOU will know what is best..
Love ya girly..
Keep the faith..

Sniffles and Smiles said...

Dearest Joannah...I'm just so very, very sorry...You are so courageous, and I just know God is going to bless you for your love and faithfulness...You remain in my prayers daily...Sending you a huge hug...and much love, Janine XO

elainaann said...

You are an amazing woman. I can't imagine that this is easy for you, but your strength and your dependency on God shines through your words.

Praying for you and your husband.

mekate said...

Sending love Joannah, and wishes for more snuggle time with your Michael, even if it is just for a few moments at a time.
I think of you so much and wish that somehow this new medication will help on all fronts, and that the radiation for the scalp lesions will work quickly and well.

sending love, sending love, sending love,

Donna said...

I don't know what to say except {{{{hugs}}}}

Our Blog: Double Happiness!

Calico Sky said...

Oh Joannah, I'm so so so sorry about your Grandma.

I'm glad Michael is feeling better, I'm sure people will understand he needs short visits.

I'm going to do a fasting prayer for you both tomorrow, over health and parenthood.

Kudo said...

Prayers have been flying up for you both all week and I have a new candel that I will be lighting every morning when I pray for you both.