Monday, October 27, 2008

My Perspective

I just read this, and it got me thinking about my own inner conversations about IF because infertility makes you think - a lot. Sometimes it's an obsession, actually.

Will my period start?

If so, when?

What should we do next?

Am I running out of time?

How much will this cost?

Why won't our insurance cover anything?

She's pregnant?!

I can't make those plans now. We might need to be home for treatment.

Why is this happening to us?

The obsessive thinking and worrying can go on and on. Infertility is a battle of the mind as much as it is a battle of biology, but it's the battle of the mind that I refuse to lose.

I have chosen to face this struggle while clinging to my faith in the goodness of my God and his perfect plan for my life. The more I trust Him the less I obsess. That doesn't mean I don't play an active part in knowing our options and making decisions. It just means that I don't allow the worry and desperation to consume me and rob me of my joy in life. I will allow myself a day or two to mourn the arrival of my period and the loss of that month's hope (and be grumpy about it!), but then it's time to move on.

I share this in hopes of encouraging those who are facing infertility to rekindle your faith if you've let it lapse. Open your heart to Him and receive His perfect peace. If you don't know where to begin, there are a lot of books about infertility and faith on the market. I've read a couple of them and they've affirmed my perspective on this journey towards parenthood.

Peace to you!

7 comments:

Kayce said...

Joannah your attitude is beautiful. When I gave it to Him with our adoption, my mind stopped and my heart beat again. Don't loose that joy in your life. You are so beautiful!

Shelley said...

Amen ...keep that joy, Joannah. Your life has so much of it already. Proud of you and the perspective you have on all this.

wzgirl said...

Hoping for the best for you, Joannah! xo

AprilMay said...

Joannah, this is beautiful and applicable for all difficult situations. Thank you!

sheryl said...

The wisdom in this post is beautiful. I have just recently stumbled on your blog and find so much inspiration in your words!

Sheryl

Parisienne Farmgirl said...

You are amazing.

PIPO said...

Such strength!

Hugs to you on your path to parenthood.